Sunday, March 23, 2014


Last week we spent some time with our female assassins, but it wouldn’t be fair if I left out the boys. So now we are onto the boys that can kill you with their pinkie, or a gun, or a sword, or well….anything. What are your favorites?

V (V for Vendetta): V is a great character. An anarchist who wears a Guy Fawkes mask, V was an experiment where prisoners were given injections of a compound called Batch 5. This gives him advanced strength, reflexes, endurance and pain tolerance. As an assassin he isn’t too shabby either. Though his weapons of choice are daggers, he is also quite fond of explosives, tear gas, and hacking. He is hyper-intelligent and personally I love that he systematically takes down Norsefire who rule his dystopian UK.

Jason Bourne (Bourne Series): Though I have not read the book series, I am overly fond of the movies. David Webb has been many things and one of them is Jason Bourne, a trained assassin, operative, and all around bad ass. He is skilled in martial arts, firearms, explosives, and driving a variety of cars in a very fun ways. He speaks multiple languages, isn’t too bad to look at, and can Macgyver weapons in cringe worthy ways (pen…that’s all I have to say. Though book and towel works too)

Martin Blank (Grosse Pointe Blank): As a big fan of Mr John Cusack I had to include Martin Blank. Martin is a depressed professional assassin who finds no more love in his work as good as he is at it. After a botched contract he heads back to his hometown for his high school reunion. I love that he tells everyone at his reunion that he is a contract killer and everyone just laughs. No. Really. Love this film and love this assassin.

Edward (Anita Blake Series): Edward was the Monster Hunter long before Anita Blake arrived on the scene. He is the poster boy of assassins, completely unassuming and a bit of a sociopath. The reason he is such a bad ass is because he chose to hunt supernatural targets after assassinating humans became too easy. Though sadly his character changed a lot (shame on you Hamilton), he is still one of my favorite assassins in Fiction

James Bond (Bond Series): How could I not put Mr. Bond in this collection. Debonair, bad ass, and with a penchant for martinis, James Bond is the man. He assassinates with style and always gets the girl. Armed with gadgets from Q, silenced guns, or sometimes just his fists, Bond has been killing bad guys and saving the world since 1953. I have loved many of his incarnations and will continue to do so.

Wade Wilson/Deadpool (Marvel): Oh Deadpool. The assassin/merc with a snarky mouth of gold, Deadpool will crack a joke as he dismembers your body. You would probably laugh too if you were still alive. A mutant with an attitude and some mental issues, he has an accelerated healing factor which helps when his martial arts, swordsmanship and marksman skills fail him. I love him. He’s my favorite comic merc with a smirk. Also I am okay with Ryan Reynolds playing him in a film version.

Ezio Auditore (Assassin’s Creed): It was hard to choose between my two favorite video game assassins, but Ezio beat Agent 47 by a bit mostly because we see him turn into the bad ass as we play the game. And bad ass he is. Love the hidden blades and the parkour. You know you do too.

Honorable Mentions: The Jackal (The Jackal), Agent 47 (Hitman), Kincaid (Harry Dresden Files), Mr. Smith (Mr and Mrs Smith)

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